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It's not THEM - It's YOU!


If you manage or lead people or you are a parent, there is a tendency on some days to believe that your staff - or children - spend their nights trying to figure out ways to irritate you.

They’re moving way too slow.

They complete tasks, but not the way you wanted.

They are listening to music you can’t stand.

They left a mess.

They’re playing with their phone instead of paying attention.

Need I go on? Really, they must know better!

Have you ever noticed that the days they are driving you crazy are the days that someone cuts you off on the highway, you ended up running late and the Barista was pretty rude to you at the local coffee shop? It all makes you feel like you should go back to bed and start over.

You REALLY SHOULD. At least that’s what I’m finding.

When I am having one of those days when everyone is driving me crazy, I hear this little voice in my head that says, “It’s not THEM. It’s YOU!”

That little voice is right. When I’m feeling great, all of those things don’t bother me. I don’t even pay attention to those things that drive me crazy.

Maybe someone cuts me off every day, but on those other days, I don’t take it personally and feel compelled to mumble “Jacka—“ from behind the wheel.

When I was an executive, I used to tell my teams if any of them were having “one of those days” that they just couldn’t feel even a little bit happy about coming to work, they should just stay home. Call me and tell me you need a “Mental Day”.

I would rather have them stay home then to come in and be miserable and make everyone around them miserable too. Everyone deserves a Mental Day once in awhile.

I’m learning to take my own advice. Sometimes, I’ll take an extra 15 or 20 minutes and crawl back in bed or cut my day short to go meditate or take a nap.

When I do that, somehow the world (and all the people in it) just seem a whole lot better.

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